NICABM – Practical Strategies for Helping Clients Who Struggle with Regret

Description Of Practical Strategies for Helping Clients Who Struggle with Regret

“If Only . . .” — Healing the Pain and Grief of Regret
run away from regretRegret can keep clients chained to a painful past.

It can lead clients to fixate on past mistakes and constantly lament the “what-ifs” of the path not taken. It can keep them trapped in a belief that if only they could go back and have even just one “do-over,” their whole life would be different.

What’s more, when regret becomes chronic, it can keep clients locked in vicious cycles of shame, guilt, self-blame, and self-loathing.

So how do we help when a client is so fixated on “what might have been” that they’re sabotaging what IS (as well as what’s yet to come)?

What You’ll Lean In Practical Strategies for Helping Clients Who Struggle with Regret

We asked 21 of the top experts in the field to share practical, effective strategies that can help clients turn their regret into a catalyst for deep change. This is the result . . .

Practical Strategies for Helping Clients Who Struggle with Regret

Disrupting the Cycle of Shame and Guilt That Can Keep Clients Locked in Regret
George Faller, MS, LMFT   Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT
Usha Tummala-Narra, PhD   Ron Siegel, PsyD

• Two Primary Ways That Compassion-Focused Therapy Can Chip Away at Shame and Regret
• One Way to Approach the Delicate Process of Working with Regret Around Moral Injury
• 5 Core Reasons Clients Often Cling to Regret
• Helping Clients Shift Out of “Shame Convictions”

Working with the Ingrained Patterns of Ruminating and Obsessive Thinking That Intensify Regret
Dennis Tirch, PhD   Lynn Lyons, LICSW
Juliane Taylor Shore, LPC, LMFT, SEP

• Two Distinct Ways to Conceptualize Rumination, and How Each Can Impact Your Approach to Regret
• A 3-Step Strategy to Help Your Client Course-Correct When the Brain Defaults to Unhealthy Patterns of Rumination
• One Essential Reframe to Help Your Client Understand What Rumination Really Is
• An EMDR Approach to Target the Source of a Client’s Regret and Obsessive Thinking

Unraveling Trauma’s Impact on a Client’s Experience of Regret
Zindel Segal, PhD   Thema Bryant, PhD
Terry Real, MSW, LICSW   Michael Yapko, PhD   Elliott Connie, MA, LPC

• Two Key Strategies for Helping Your Client Work Through Trauma-Induced Regret
• Assessing When to Move from One Phase of Treatment to the Next in Working with Regret Rooted in Trauma
• The Link Between Regret and a Client’s Window of Tolerance (and How You Might Use It to Inform Your Approach)
• One Particular Skill That Can Be Crucial When You’re Working with Regret Fueled by Trauma

Working with the Impact of Regret On Your Client’s Relationships
Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT   Thema Bryant, PhD   Chris Willard, PsyD

• Strategies to Help You Approach Cycles of Regret-Fueled Conflict within a Couple’s Relationship
• How to Help When a Client’s Response to a Past Regret Sabotages Their Current Relationship
• Addressing a Couple’s Cycle of Regret Through the Lens of Attachment
• One Specific Type of Crossroads a Client May Come to as They Confront Regret (and How to Help Them Navigate)

Key First Steps to Help Clients Begin to Reverse Out of Regret
Janina Fisher, PhD   Ruth Lanius, MD, PhD
Raymond Rodriguez, LCSW-R, Rev   Russell Kolts, PhD
Eboni Webb, PsyD

• A Critical Piece of Neuroscience That Can Help You Conceptualize a Function of Regret for Your Client
• One Distinction That Can Shape a Client’s Experience of Regret (and Impact Your Approach)
• What Can Happen When Someone Doesn’t Experience Regret
• One Insidious Side-Effect of Regret, and the Question That Can Help Clients Shift Out of It

Strategies to Help Clients Disrupt the Anxiety-Avoidance-Regret Loop
George Faller, MS, LMFT   Terry Real, MSW, LICSW
Juliane Taylor Shore, LPC, LMFT, SEP   Russell Kolts, PhD
Chris Willard, PsyD   Ruth Lanius, MD, PhD

• Helping Clients Confront a Common 2-Step Process That Often Ends In Regret
• 2 Specific Aspects of Regret That Clients Most Often Try to Avoid (and How to Help Them Move Out of That Avoidance)
• How to Respond When a Client Is Reluctant to Sit with the Difficult Feelings That Regret Stirs Up

Helping Clients Use Regret as a Springboard for Meaningful Change
Janina Fisher, PhD   Joan Borysenko, PhD
Frank Anderson, MD   Eboni Webb, PsyD   Deany Laliotis, LICSW

• A Narrative-Based Strategy to Help Clients Shift Away from Regret and Connect to Their Values
• Specific Questions That Can Help Clients Convert Their Values into Action
• A 3-Step Process to Help Clients Move Beyond an “If Only” Mindset
• How to Help Regretful Clients Balance Accountability with Self-Forgiveness

Resourcing Clients with Creative Ways to Guard Against Regret
Eboni Webb, PsyD   Thema Bryant, PhD
Michael Yapko, PhD   Juliane Taylor Shore, LPC, LMFT, SEP

• A “Regret Prevention” Strategy to Help Clients Shift Their Approach to Decision-Making
• Helping Clients “Read Into” Regret to Discover Important Insight About Their Future Selves
• Critical Check-Ins That Can Help Your Client Process Past Regret While Also Progressing Toward Change

About NICABM

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